What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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