that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize
