Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize
