JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Randomize
