I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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