Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Randomize
