North Korea, Best Korea!
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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