Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
