he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
