Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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