I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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