At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
