what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
