I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
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