Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I am mentally ready for anal.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize
