so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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