She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
