i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
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