Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
