you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
