Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I wish there were birth control emojis
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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