I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
