if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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