Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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