she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
