i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize
