There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
