wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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