I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
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