FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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