I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Randomize
