Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Porn is love you can see.
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
My breasts were aching with rage.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize