that's an acceptable place to lick
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
