he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
