i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
