This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize
