did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
