she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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