goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
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