omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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