I am spending my child support on dildos
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
She just used a chaser for red wine.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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