I must be too annoying 4 u.
your thong is hanging out like whoa
Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Randomize