Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
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