There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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