let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
