I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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