she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Randomize