That's intense
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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