Sorry, I don't speak sober.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize
