I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Randomize
