At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize